The Mom Test

I come from a music/audio background. When I was in college, we were taught the Car Test, being budding recordists. The Car Test, for those who are not familiar, is when you take the mix you did on a pair of speakers that are designed for critical listening and play it on the shittiest set of speakers you can find. (This might be the iPod Headphones Test or the Laptop Speakers Test, but I learned it as the Car Test.)

This is Everything I Hate About Music

LOOK WHAT THE GTR CAN DO!!!!!!

No seriously, this is horrible, horrible, shit. Horrible. The people defending this as “noise” are fucking idiots. I’ve had the pleasure of working with some great avant-garde artists in my career as a producer, and every person that makes Noise music and is worth his salt would say the same.

I’m also a classically trained guitarist. The people saying “no but they’re really good technically” are fucking idiots as well. You could teach a monkey to play guitar like that. Can you type? You can play like that, too. Let’s hear one of those guys play Barrios’ “Julia Florida”. I bet it would sound like someone having a colonoscopy.

Bird News 9

After we found out everyone was safe, two of my illustrious colleagues and I made this video.

A Christmas Story

Okay. I really want to know. Why do you love or hate this movie? It seems to me that people are absolutely polarized. I can’t think of anybody who just says “oh, that movie’s alright”.

I am in the “love it” group. I was (and am) the kid with the one-track mind, intensely coveting for months leading up to Christmas. I left catalogs on my Mom’s pillow, not so subtly suggesting things I wanted. My grandfather battled the furnace and swore in tongues none of us could understand. To me, these are all universal themes.

Let’s call this a very amateur sociological experiment. Leave your views on this subject in a comment. I’m interested to see what makes people go one way or the other.

Reading “Twilight” Now Compulsory

In case you didn’t know, the United States government has now passed a law that makes reading Stephanie Meyer’s “Twilight” series mandatory for all persons over the age of 9. Seeing the movie is an acceptable, but not preferred option.

However, offending parties can shorten their sentences with a written or aural examination on the Harry Potter series if they elect to do so.

Watch “Ronin”, Learn About Business

Ever think about this? You can learn such a wealth of things from this movie- project management, negotiation, business administration. It’s all there.

Storm Envy

It’s always interesting to see what a catalyst product will do to an industry.

Ruby Rags

There’s a place that makes shirts for Ruby/Rails geeks called RubyRags. The above picture is a rough sketch of my idea for a Ruby t-shirt. Maybe I am adding this to the list of jokes I need a whiteboard and a laser pointer to explain?

Tiki Barber on Iron Chef America

I was just watching an episode of Food Network’s “Iron Chef America” where Tiki Barber was featured as a judge. To give you an idea of how it went:

(Iron Chef serves the dish, explains in detail his intent and execution.)

Judge A: I think this is delicious. Your use of these bright, acidic citrus flavors really cuts through the darkness of the duck breast.

Judge B: I agree. And the bacon blended with the citrus really takes any kind of gamey taste out of this. Well done.

Tiki: I like bacon.

(Next dish is presented.)

Judge A: I’ll bet you this is going to be dry! I never think turkey is cooked moist enough.

Judge B: No! I think it’s just right- just the right amount of moisture. And I’m impressed that the moisture you were able to hold onto didn’t make the skin soggy.

Judge A: But look how long you have to chew the meat! That means it’s dry!

Tiki: My shoes are real comfortable.

Lessons I Learned In The Trenches, No. 1

I consider myself very fortunate to be making a decent living doing several different things with music. This morning, I was reflecting on some very simple things I’ve learned over the last 5 or so years of being a real “professional”. I wish it didn’t take so long to learn these things, but I suppose such is the nature of being in a profession where you never stop learning. Here are a few things to start the ball rolling.

If you happen to stumble upon this, I hope it helps.